Guy Fawkes is nothing in Canada

Spending November 5th in Niagara is weird for me. No fireworks! But saves a fortune in those increasingly disappointing wee efforts that I spend vast amounts of money on.

These latest “barrage” fireworks are the worst. You know the ones, lazy man squibs that you light once and they then send out a predetemined number of “shots” (25, 50, 100 etc).  Where’s the fun in that. The NEQ is miserable (Net Explosive Quantity for those not au fait with the world of squibs).

And most of the fun is in trying to light the fuse with those fiddly wee wands you get with the box of fireworks. Then the uncertainty…”Did I light it?” “It’s not went off yet”. But you can’t go back, …..but you always do!

Then  my brother’s party trick of throwing these dodgy fireworks into the bonfire!!   Such fun.

Then you get the safety instruction.  GARDEN FIREWORK “Stand back 25 metres”

Who in the UK has the 25 metre garden….Stand up…I want to meet you.

Where in the City of Glasgow can you stand 25 metres from anywhere. That’s why I suppose they have the big one in Glasgow Green. One of the few places where you can stand back 25 metres.

I’ll spend my firework money on something else this week..eating burgers in A&W or Harveys or the downmarket joint…mcdonalds? Or nice wine from the Niagara Region.

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